Breathe
by needsmoreicing
Summary: "I don't understand how you could turn your back on something so important! This place means everything to me and you turned your back on it for a girl!"
1. Fall Down

She's fine, most of the time  
She takes her days with a smile  
She moves like, a dancer in lights  
Spinning around to sound  
But sometimes she falls down

* * *

You can see it on their faces.

The one's who have figured out life much faster than the others.

That's the problem with children. They are too perceptive. They've figured out the ending of the story before you've even written the middle. They know the steps, even if they're too young to understand the dance. Angry noises reflect in the way that they first play an instrument; it's either to timid or to rough, like they're scared of being to much or simply not enough.

Little boys try to drown it out by being a 'man'. What does that even mean? When does voiding yourself of basic reactions make you a stronger individual?

It is the young ladies that show the signs the most. Because, as much as they'd hide it, girls thrive on emotion.

A flash of bright colors and a frenzy of movement, brings the much deserved eyes of her peers on to a young dancer. She's precise, accurate and very controlled for a twelve year old. She's not looking to be _just_ noticed, she's looking for recognition that she's the best.

The little blonde one also craves the attention of her fellow campers. She's learned to use her mother's name to get the eyes on her. After all, who hasn't heard of her mother? What aspiring artist doesn't dream of having that same wild success?

The answer is reflected by her counter part.

The small Filipino girl who stands in the back. She says nothing. She sings harmony. She doesn't miss her steps, but she doesn't make herself known either. She does not want the attention that comes with her family name. The added backlash that comes with having angry parents or an unhappy home. The wondering looks and questioning eyes. She will fade into nothing if she doesn't let herself shine like the sequined bow in her hair.

And I can do nothing but hope that I can break through to her. Make that step towards letting her truly be free. Give her a solid place to land. It's my job to make her feel like she's found a real home over the next two months. Right. No pressure.

* * *

Plates crashed to the ground and Ella whimpered in fear, curling further into her blankets. Screaming at the top of their lungs, her parents went through their nightly routine. Was her father cheating on her mother with a business associate? Who was to blame for Ella not being picked up from school? Who had fooled Ella into believing that music was a realistic career option? Who had wanted children in the first place? Which parent had more control of preventing pregnancy? Who wanted the kids?

She held on to her pillow and let everything drain out of her. Shaking violently, she just continued to cry. She wouldn't be here much longer anyway. Soon the warmth of camp would just let her back in, asking for nothing as it always did. Her head shot up as the door creaked open.

"Ellie? I'm scared." Her little brother, Tanner, whispered while holding on to his teddy bear. Ella wiped her eyes furiously, he'd never know how much she hurt. She patted the space next to her on the bed and he clambered up, tucking himself against her chest. From up the stairs they could hear more things being thrown around, breaking, hitting the walls, and Tanner inched closer at every sound. "When will they stop?" He asked, covering his eyes.

"Soon, they'll stop soon enough." Ella replied, rubbing soothing circles on his back. They had to stop eventually, right? Surely they couldn't destroy everything. Ella's heart caught in her throat as Tanner released a shuttering breath.

If she wasn't here to take care of Tanner, who would be?

Tanner was crying into her shoulder as the screaming became louder, her tears leaked out as well as she realized her options. Leave Tanner and find her own safety while leaving him alone to fend for himself against their parents. Or give up the only place that felt like home.

He dug his hands into her t-shirt and gave a heaving sob, and she felt her stomach drop.

She knew her choice.

* * *

"This is Brown Cessario, how can I help you?" Ella sniffled lightly as she looked over at her brother watching his Saturday morning cartoons.

"H-hi, this is Ella. Ella Pador."

"Oh, hello love. What can I do for my favorite glitter queen?" His light hearted tone dug her further into misery.

"I- I just wanted to call and say that I'm going to withdraw from c-camp." She stuttered, her lip trembling. She heard him spit out his drink and give a cough.

"R-really? Ella, you've been coming here for years." Brown questioned, knowing her home life this had to be something major. He'd never seen Ella smile as much as she did at camp.

"Yes sir, I can't really leave my brother with my parents." She didn't say anything more, but Brown could hear her suffering in silence. There was a pause and the wheels turned rapidly in Brown's mind.

"What if I told you there was a children's program?" Ella's brow furrowed, there hadn't been a kid's program in all the six years she'd been coming to camp.

"I'd have to ask how, when, and how much does it cost?" On the other end Brown clicked the files that he and Dee had been working on the entire year. The program wasn't set to open until the following year, but Brown hated to lose loyal campers, especially those with troubled backgrounds.

"Well, as your sibling, his first year would be free of charge," He flinched knowing that was a poor business move, but what ever got Ella out of her home. "As for the other two, Dee and I had been debating for years about setting up a Junior's program. I think that it would last the same amount of time the regular camp would." He sent a quick e-mail to Dee, letting her know that they needed to move things along with the JR's program. "Ju-just e-mail me the information about your brother, Ella. I hate to rush on you poppet, but I've got a lot to take care of here at the grounds."

"Wait! Wait! What type of information? Would it be like my campers application?" She crossed her fingers, hoping that life would just give her this _one_ break. Just once.

"Yes, that'll do. Now, I've really got to go. I'll e-mail you back if I need other paperwork."

A grin spread across her face and her stomach unclenched.

"Thank you... Thank you so much Brown!"

* * *

She taught them how to hem.

She took ruddy, clumsy, goofy guitar playing boys and taught them how to hem things or use that contraption that adds jewels.

Ella came back to us at camp, stood by us and returned everything that she'd ever learned here. I've never been more proud to see her finally come into her own. I thank all my lucky stars that I laid my chips on Ella. The summer can only tell what will happen next.

Tanner seems to be happy here, he's much more open than Ella was in her first years. You can see how important Ella is to the young boy. I doubt many of the others have noticed their interactions. Ella sneaking Tanner his teddy bear from her luggage or him taking her a sandwich when she's locked herself away in the wardrobe cabin.

I hope that I can keep the camp open. If only to help keep the world off of the kid's shoulders for a little bit longer.


	2. All That You Need

Breathe, just breathe,  
Take the world off your shoulders  
and put it on me  
breathe, just breathe,  
Let the life that you live be all you need

* * *

She's a ghost.

Drifting along through the crowds, blending seamlessly with her surroundings with only the slightest words spoken to remind us of her presence.

Why did she want us to forget she was there so easily? What was the appeal? How would anyone discover how talented she was if she hid behind mediocre dancing and background vocals?

She sits with one of the Juniors at lunch, ruffles his hair, and talks to him more than she's ever talked to any of us. Peggy included. It's not until the little guy latches on to her for a hug that I realize that Ella has a brother.

How often had I hugged Jason the same way when I was his age?

Ella held him like a life line, something that kept her grounded. I knew that look better than most people thought. I had Mitchie to keep me from sinking.

But that raised a new question.

What was Ella sinking into?

* * *

Fabric, sewing, and hemming.

Ella hated all of it, but had been forced to break out her knowledge if only to save her home.

"Shane, you have to stand still. If you don't your pants are going to be lopsided." Ella frowned while adjusting the pins that didn't quite line up thanks to Shane's constant fidgeting. He let out an irritated huff, trying to keep from tapping his foot impatiently. Shane eyed Ella as she moved in a frenzy around the wardrobe cabin. To the untrained eye, it looked as if she was just stressed out but enjoying herself. He knew that look too.

He used that look at the very beginning of his career, trying to squash down his resentment of the label's dictation.

"Why do you do this if you hate it?" Ella froze and Shane allowed himself to smirk in triumph.

"I-I don't hate it." Ella defended as she slammed the drawers around, looking for her pin cushion.

"Yes you do." Shane countered, taking a seat on the podium. "You hate being in the cabin. But you never leave. Why do you do something if you hate it?"

Ella gripped the table and hung her head in defeat, maybe he'd just let it go if she told him the truth.

"Because if they're aren't any costumes there wont be a performance. If we don't preform it's a forfeit, and then we'd lose the camp."

Shane took her generic answer with a nod. "But why do you care?" Ella didn't respond, so Shane decided to fish for an answer.

"Jason, Nate and I... we grew up here. This is where it all started for us, that's why we're in it to win." He jumped on to the floor and circled over to where she was. "Mitchie loves this place because of how it's shaped her as a artist. But you... you're more than happy to sit in the background, so why do you care now?"

A tiny fist pounded on to the hard wood table.

"Dammit Shane, you think you're the only one who grew up here?" Ella met his eyes with a glare. "Camp Rock is my _home_. It's the only place where I feel safe. It's the only place where my little brother can make friends without everything being ruined by our parents. My_ family_ is here."

Her jaw locked and she sunk her claws in. "Plus, I don't see your brother doing much around here. He's so caught up in Dana that I'm surprised he even teaches his classes." She took a tense breath and tears watered in her eyes as she ran a hand through her hair.

"God, I'm my parents." She sobbed, walking away from the table. The door squeaked open and both heads turned to face Tanner.

"Hey Tanner, what's up kiddo?" Ella tried to play off her emotions from earlier and Shane kept up flawlessly.

"I was bringin' you lunch." He gave a toothy grin, offering the sandwich to his older sister. "It's a nutella and banana samich, I told Mrs. Connie how you like 'em." Ella gave her brother a grin, ruffling his hair and enveloping him in a hug like Shane had witnessed everyday.

"Thanks, you're the best little brother a girl could ask for." If there was one thing Shane felt that Ella was completely devoted to, it was that little kid. He just watched them for a minute, trying to put together the little snatches of information he had.

1)Ella considered the others to be her family, something Shane felt like she'd been excluded from.

2)Nate was making her angry because he wasn't giving it his all, while she'd forced herself to be miserable if it meant the camp could stay open.

3)And she didn't like yelling to get her point across.

Guilt weighed heavily in his stomach as the siblings continued to interact. Tanner telling a story about Jason and Ella's eyes lighting up with joy when he mentions his friendship with the camera kid. How could anyone miss this? How could they brush over her?

He cleared his throat, dragging them out of their own personal world. He mumbled an apology, quickly changed his clothes and exited the cabin.

Rolling up his sleeves, Shane set out on a mission.

* * *

"Do you know Ella?" Shane asks upon entering their joint cabin. Nate shakes his head and Jason becomes unusually quiet while tuning is guitar and plucks the strings before nodding.

"Yeah, she stops by the Junior Rocker's cabin to drop off Tanner's teddy bear every night."

"But do you know _anything _about her?" Shane presses, Jason shifts uncomfortably and nods again.

"I- I can't really tell you anything." He looks distressed and polishes a nonexistent scratch, bouncing his leg nervously. "I'm not even sure I'm supposed to know."

Nate heaves a sigh while rolling his eyes, he didn't have time for this, he was going to be late for his date with Dana.

"Look, we're your brothers, you're obligated to tell us." Nate countered, setting his own guitar in its case.

Jason's jaw locks, his eyes harden, and Shane swears that he's never seen anyone look so angry.

"Nate, you just don't get it man." Jason grits, his grip on the guitar tightens till his knuckles are white. "You can't just have someone's horror of a LifeTime Movie and then hand it off to the next person. People's lives don't work like that, and you need to respect that."

"It can't be that bad."

Jason shook his head, jaw still locked. "You just don't get it, you just_ won't_ get it."

Shane leaned back in his bunk, folding his arms behind his back.

* * *

"Shane, what are you doing here?" Shane continued to toss one of her spools of thread in the air.

"I asked people about you, ya know." He made eye contact with her and she froze in her spot. "The only one who seemed to know anything about you was Jason."

Panic set in as she thought over what Shane had said. What did Jason know and how much had he told Shane?

As if he could read her mind, he smiled gently and shook his head. "Out of everything, Jason is fiercely loyal. He wouldn't tell us a thing. So I came to ask you myself." He set the spool down and leaped of the table. "I want to know why you're hiding."

Ella sighed and wrapped her ponytail around her finger, thinking of away to avoid his confrontation. Shane laughed loudly and clapped a hand on the table. "Oh, man. I know that look." He wagged a finger, giving a cheeky grin. "You're trying to avoid the answer." Ella felt a blush creep across the bridge of her nose and sweeping up her forehead.

"I-I'm not."

"Bullshit." Ella gave her hair a yank and scowled.

"How do you know?" She was challenging him where there was nothing to challenge.

"Because I gave that look plenty." He grinned, clapping a hand to her shoulder. "Do you have a phone?"

"Does it matter?" Shane laughed at her defensiveness.

"Yes, what if I want to talk to you before we come back to camp next summer."

"You mean _if_ we come back next summer." His stomach clenched, but his grin stayed in place.

"No, no dear Ella,_ when_." She wish that she could have that extraordinary faith, that belief that everything was going to work out, but she could not allow herself that kind of luxury. There was more than herself to think about, and her mind was racing a mile a minute about the_ 'what if's_. Shane's gaze softened and he squeezed her shoulder. "When, Ella, just when."

* * *

Devastation.

It's the only thing that paints her face as the announcement is made. Tanner barely touches her before she breaks out in a run towards camp. Tanner looks confused before running off to the back stage area, quickly flanked by Trevor. Peggy and Lola comforted each other, and Mitchie cradled into my arms.

But who had Ella?

Caitlyn rubbed Jason's back slowly and Nate stood awkwardly in front of Dana both couples not sure what to do next. Caitlyn kissed Jason's head and Dana shook Nate's hand.

But no one went after Ella.

Guilt rose and consumed.

This was her home too.

"Hey Mitch, I've got to go take care of someone really quick." She smiled softly and kissed my cheek, exactly what I needed right at this moment, and nodded her head.

"I think Ella needs you more than I do right now anyway, Pop-star." Mitchie squeezed my hand, backing up slightly and smoothing down the front of my jacket. "She needs a friend now more than ever."

She needed something constant now that she didn't have her home.


End file.
